Jacob Basset
The Dreams I Can’t Forget
I dreamt of you again last night:
Golden, auburn shackles gripping
Lifeless pools, shallow crystal probing
Speckled snowfall in hapless bounding
You didn’t see me; I didn’t speak.
I dreamt of you again last night:
Hollow echoes joyfully doubled
Rare thoughts dutifully offered
Branding touch so coyly forced
You wouldn’t leave me; I couldn’t breathe.
I dreamt of you again last night:
We share a dying situation
We hold the time by hurting
We live, clinging, suffuse the air
You say you love me; I tell you, too.
I dreamt of you again last night:
Sick of what I say
Tired of who I am
Frustrated with my mind
Disappointed by my body
Insisting nothing changed but
Burying me
Drowning me
Strangling me
Leaving me
You apologize; I can only beg.
I dreamt of you again last night:
I still marvel at your silken hair
I still stare at your eyes, transfixed
I still find your pale skin perfectly flawed
You won’t look at me; I don’t know why.
I dreamt of you again last night:
You laugh with him, unfazed
You talk with him, the same
You draw him close, but more
You love him, maybe; I used to love.
I dreamt of you again last night:
Sky broken open, forever dividing
Ground bent, drawing together
Connected, severed
You are the same; I am the same.
I dreamt of you again last night:
The air between us is stagnant
The moments are unbearable
This will never change
We cannot return
Even though we never left
This, too, will never change
We aren’t in love
You always seem to be
This will never change
You are for someone else; I am for you.
I will dare to move
I will run from you
I will crawl out of my darkness
I will flee from this terror
I will change
I will become something new
I will do everything to improve
I will turn myself into a hero
I will live to please you
I will, I will
You don’t know; I think I do.
But for now,
I dream of you every night.