Younger sister
Your innocence used to be the most beautiful thing I have ever seen
I remember when I craved the purity that you held in your gentle grip
I remember when I spoke of sex, your virgin body would get stiff and your cheeks would burn red
I remember when you looked at your bumpy body in the mirror, and you were content
Oh, younger sister
Did you believe that you wouldn’t lose your self-worth?
Did you ever imagine a day where you would obsess over the temple that god gave you?
Did you think you could keep your innocence stored behind all of your oversized clothes?
If I told you that a year from now you’d be starving yourself before every meal,
Would you believe me?
Little sister
You are not defined by the sickening social ideal of an attractive woman
Just because your love handles hang over the edges of your too-small jeans
It does not mean that you are flawed
Oh, Little sister
When you look in the mirror do you see yourself as a fuckdom?
Do you respect the naked little girl who looks back at you?
When did you lose your innocence?
It is crazy that I don’t recognize your voice anymore
You spend hours telling me how losing your virginity made you into a woman
And that as your bodies clashed in the woods, you were so in love
Do you believe the words you spat out of your mouth?
And after he left you, did you believe that your body was a battle field?
Did you care whether the razor cut too deep?
Did you give yourself a limit to your madness?
Sister, I know your heart is broken, but will you please keep this meal down?
Tiny sister
Just a month ago you told me that you preferred death
You began playing Russian roulette, swallowing pills to mask the sadness
Putting beer bottles to your lips to hide the pain
Is it working?
Do you have purpose as he presses his lips against your neck and says that you’re fuckable
Well tiny sister
Does it make you feel sexy when the skin of your sunken belly wraps around your boney hips?
Are you proud of the weight-obsessed girl you see in the mirror?
Are your secrets exciting?
When we eat out does your heart race as you walk to the bathroom?
Do you get a high?
Don’t you fucking tell me you were just fixing your make-up
Vanishing sister
Your war-torn body is no longer as sturdy as it used to be
But I see the pain erupting from your hazel eyes, I know you’re trying to escape
Stop holding yourself back
Oh, vanishing sister
Don’t you see that you are worth more?
More than how much food you can get out of your stomach
More than how a man touches your boney little body
More than how your silhouette looks in the mirror
You are worth so much more
Younger sister
A year from now you will be purging your thanksgiving meal into mom’s bathroom toilet
Your thighs will be etched with tally marks of how many times your heart has been broken
Innocent younger sister
I know that you are so young right now and this doesn’t make sense
But it will
Please, imagine your beautiful body laying at the morgue
Can you see yourself there?
How does it make you feel?
Never wish death upon yourself, put the razor back in the drawer where it came from
Younger sister
I have missed you so much
I miss the way you used to lay with me on the couch eating jars of Nutella
I was so jealous of how you knew that behind every pound of fat on your body
You were beautiful
Sister
You are beautiful