Meredith by Zach Murphy

Each night, Meredith places her husband’s blue terry cloth robe next to her in the bed. Before she turns off the dusty bedside lamp and drifts into her dreams, she drapes the robe’s fraying sleeve across her body, hoping to feel a faint embrace, if just for a fleeting second. When she wakes in the morning, sometimes she smells the aroma of dark roast coffee wafting into her bedroom. As she journeys downstairs, the steps creek like her bones. She looks into the kitchen and it’s always empty. Maybe the aroma has lingered in the tattered walls. The walls hold a lot of history. Or maybe the aroma has lingered in her head. Her head holds a lot of memories. She keeps the windows closed during the day,
even when the temperatures are sultry. This makes it easier to feel a desperate breeze. The house is over a century old, so she realizes it’s no stranger to witnessing drafts. At dinner time, she swears she sees the tablecloth move every once and a while, especially on the nights when she cooks her husband’s most cherished meal of beef stroganoff, garlic potatoes, and red peppers. She knows that your eyes can play tricks on you, but she’d rather not blame her cataracts. After the sun sets, the same routine begins. Some people
fear ghosts, but Meredith fears missing out on what could have been. Time is an excruciating toothache when it doesn’t give you what you long for. Meredith learns that moving forward is even harder when you want to be haunted by the past.

Zach Keali’i Murphy is a Hawaii-born writer with a background in cinema. His stories appear in The MacGuffinReed MagazineThe Coachella ReviewRaritan QuarterlyAnother Chicago MagazineLittle Patuxent Review, and more. He has published the chapbook Tiny Universes (Selcouth Station Press). He lives with his wonderful wife, Kelly, in St. Paul, Minnesota.

The Leap by J.B. Polk

It was happening! Leila's nightmare was about to come true! The thing had finally managed to make its way into her abdomen, coiling around her intestines like a ten-foot viper and setting her pancreas and liver ablaze. She was sure light would soon spring out of her belly button!

Her thoughts went back to that August day in 1995. Lunch was Welsh rarebit with roast potatoes followed by watermelon. Mom recited a Charles Simic poem as she slit its belly open, spilling its juicy blood and exposing the crimson flesh and black pips.

Green Buddhas
On the fruit stand.
We eat the smile.
And spit out the teeth.

Leila was on her third slice when Mom gently smacked her hand away.

"That's enough, sweetheart. You've had plenty of food already.”

Then, she added as an afterthought,” Did you know that if you swallow a watermelon pip, it can do some weird things and even take over your body?"

The image that popped into ten-year-old Leila’s mind was like a scene from a movie she had sneakily watched with her cousin Raymond - a horror called Alien, where a scaly creature laid eggs inside people's bellies, incubated, and burst out of their chests.

She avoided eating watermelon altogether for a while, afraid the same thing might happen to her.

When she was in her teens, entered the age of reason, and decided she wanted to study quantum physics, she realized that her mother's story was just an old wives' tale. But apparently, the ideas our moms inadvertently put into our heads when we are kids tend to come around, and we can’t let them go no matter how hard we try.

Despite her firm knowledge of how things worked in the real world, the fear of the watermelon-induced inter-belly invasion remained in the back of Leila’s mind whenever she ate a slice of that darned fruit. She tried to resort to her understanding of the principles of matter and energy to rationalize her fear. She told herself that the watermelon's juicy sweetness was merely a result of complex chemical reactions and that any notion of it invading her organism was purely irrational. Yet the "but what if…" lingered.

“What if Mom’s cautionary story holds a sinister truth? What if those tiny seeds, once ingested, unleash evil energy within me, slowly but surely devouring me from the inside out?” she thought, promptly forsaking her university training, and putting the rational side of her brain to sleep.

The tray in front of her seemed to mock her, its cold, shiny surface reflecting her growing discomfort. The once-appealing meal, complete with a watermelon rind, now looked repulsive and threatening. She couldn't shake off the feeling that the pip’s electrons had already done a sneaky quantum leap without needing a superconducting electrical circuit and were about to unleash a grotesque transformation within her. The vision of her body transformed into a weird garden of tendrils shooting a blizzard of shimmering photons made her want to cram her fist into her mouth and vomit the offending pips.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we are passing a zone of heavy turbulence. The captain has turned on the fasten the seat belt signs. Please remain seated until further notice."

The flight attendant's voice rang urgent, but nothing compared to the panic dancing a roaring fandango in Leila's gut. She had always been a fearless flyer jetting off to conferences around the world, but the announcement sent shivers down her spine this time. As she settled into her seat, the dance macabre made her think that the worst-case scenario was not engine failure, hijacking, or even a crash but a watermelon performing physics-defying tricks in her stomach!

The turbulence was now tossing the aircraft like a can of sardines someone was trying to tip into a bowl. Around her, passengers gripped their armrests while the overhead lockers rattled, threatening to spill the luggage out. Leila was sure the next movement would split the plane open, and the machine and the passengers would rain down like metal and flesh confetti, accompanied by the sound of shattering glass and screams of terror.

Soon, the inevitable would occur - the fruit would release its energy and take up all space. The belt already pinched her waist. She could almost see her stomach swell like it had been pumped full of helium. The buckle would pop off and smack the passenger next to her square in the face, gauging out his eyes. It was as if she’d downed an entire tube of Lax-a-Day. The pressure was unbearable. She knew she wouldn’t be able to hold it much longer before exploding and dripping blood and tissue all over the aircraft.

It was hard to believe that out of all the weird things that could happen to her, she'd wind up as an involuntary experiment, proving that quantum leaps both in

physics and genetic engineering were not always a welcome step forward. She'd soon become a human incubator for a watermelon!

She squeezed her eyes shut when the violent quaking got harder and harder.

"Miss! Miss!" the flight attendant standing beside her struggled to shake her awake.

"Are you okay? We're experiencing some turbulence, but we'll be through it soon. Just hold on tight and try to stay calm."

And just suddenly, as it had begun, the bloating and the fear of a pip transmuting its energy inside her vanished. She was back in her seat, safely strapped, her flat stomach tucked into her skinny size-8 jeans, the turbulence subsiding.

"I have no idea what I could have named the watermelon infant. Perhaps Dolores… Dolores Beckett, like in the “Quantum Leap” TV series. I can bet it must be excruciatingly painful to give birth to a monster fruit," she chuckled as the loudspeakers spluttered back to life, indicating they were about to land.

Polish by birth, a citizen of the world by choice. First story short-listed for the Irish Independent/Hennessy Awards, Ireland, 1996.  Since she went back to writing fiction in 2020, more than 80 of her stories, flash fiction and non-fiction, have been accepted for publication. She has recently won 1st prize in the  International Human Rights  Arts Movement literary contest.

Daniel’s Eggs by Jonathan Lacher

I love my brother. I really do. But I would be remiss in my duties as an older brother if I did not make a reasonable effort to embarrass him as publicly as possible. I could tell the story of the time he accidentally fell out of a tree while trying to jump from one branch to another (he claims he wasn’t). I could tell the story of the time he accidentally broke his arm while trying to impress his girlfriend (he claims he wasn’t). Instead, I will tell the story of the time he accidentally made scrambled eggs while trying to make brownies (he offers no defense).

Many dessert recipes involve mixing butter into the dough, and brownies especially almost always require it. To do this, people with the foresight to plan ahead know to leave some sticks of butter out to warm up to room temperature. Room-temperature butter becomes soft enough to mix with other ingredients. However, my brother is not especially known for his patience. His timeline between deciding he wanted brownies and actually making brownies was measured in minutes, not hours. My brother turned to a technique common among those of us who have a desire to cook something but lack the foresight to plan ahead. He stuck the butter in the microwave to melt it.

Normally, this works perfectly fine; The butter becomes partially melted and whatever is left becomes soft enough to stir into the rest of the ingredients. However, the laws of physics say that this process is dependent on what temperature the butter starts at and how much energy is added to the butter. Not enough energy and the core of the butter will still be too firm. In such a situation, the butter can simply be put back in the microwave for a bit longer.

My brother did not think to check the butter. He saw that the butter was starting to melt and thought that it would be good enough. I don’t know if he started with colder butter than normal or if he set the microwave to less time than normal. But, regardless of the reason, his butter was still too firm. Unfortunately, in his craving-driven haste, he did not pause before adding his next ingredient: eggs.

My brother did his best to try and beat the eggs and butter together, but quickly found he was no match for slightly chilly lipids. So, he did what he always did when the butter was too firm. He stuck it back in the microwave. What he forgot about was that he was already trying to mix eggs into the butter. A few moments later, he had his lightly warmer butter and proceeded to continue mixing it into the eggs.

It was at this point that my brother realized he had screwed up. The brief trip in a microwave was enough to cook the eggs. As he tried to beat them together, instead of a liquid mixture he got flakes of cooked egg tossed with butter. It was actually pretty decent scrambled eggs. Nice and fluffy with a firmly buttery flavor, if a bit light on spices. But, a far cry from the brownies he intended.

I should offer a defense of my brother by saying he is a perfectly competent home cook; Not only can he feed himself, but he often contributes delicious dishes to family gatherings. He took to making some brownies without thinking because he had done it before and they came out fine. But anyone who spends enough time in the kitchen will eventually have a few embarrassing mistakes. And, to my brother’s misfortune, I was close enough to witness this event. So, he was unable to hide it like many of my own kitchen mistakes have been hidden.

Jonathan is an environmental scientist who enjoys dabbling in literature.  He has published a poetry book titled Through the Ages and maintains a website of some of his works at Crayshack.com.  He has also been previously published in BittersweetZ-Sky, and Plants & Poetry.

Glimpse by Jonathan Diloy

My first memory is my mother singing.

I do not remember the title of what she was singing except that it was a simple melody of a love song from my mother’s childhood. I remember it being about a lovely girl telling her lover to look at her and take heart for she will love him all the days of her life.

It is funny that this song should be playing in my head as I lay here dying.

The gently falling autumn rain was doing an awful job of washing away the blood from my face. I cannot move my hands to wipe it off and it keeps getting into my eyes. Honestly, it is getting annoying.

I seem to no longer have any feeling in my legs. Something must have gone wrong with my spine. I imagine it is like an appliance plug getting pulled out of a wall socket, except the appliance happens to be my legs. I have seen this on TV many times. Maybe I should try to wiggle my toes.

Hmm. How can you tell you are wiggling your toes if you cannot feel them?

I can still hear my mother’s song, but now it is interspersed with the voice of the OnStar operator asking me if I am okay.

I did not know the OnStar thing still works.

The operator sounded young but professional. She is asking me about my condition. I wanted to tell her I was broken, wet, and getting blood all over my brother’s favorite sweater that I borrowed without his permission.

Of course, I did not actually say that to her. I cannot move my jaw.

She has called 911 and first responders are on the way. She says I should just hang on and they will arrive soon. Sure, I have nothing better to do.

The operator is staying on the line, talking to me, trying to keep my attention.

My mother’s song has played in a loop about five times now.

The OnStar girl is still jabbering on. She sounds like she is getting worried about me. She is doing her best to sound professional and not break out into a sobbing mess. She must be new to this. Bless your heart, lady. And, sorry for being your first... this.

My thoughts are starting to swim. Memories float to the surface. Buoyant bubbles rising to pop before my eyes.

That was how I met her: my darling girl. At the beach.

I was swimming along with my head under the water and not paying attention to where I was going when I bumped into her, burping out bubbles in surprise. I poked my eyes out of the water, the human approximation of a hippo.

The ginger girl in front of me was lanky and tall for a 13-year-old. She looked down at me with her freckled face and said: “Watch it, Bub!”

I was in love. I was 13 years old and for the first time in my life, I was in love. No. No. Not just in love... I was enamored, enchanted, and captivated. I was dumbstruck, lightning struck, and all other kinds of struck. I felt like 20,000 volts was racing through my veins.

Je suis amoureux! I was in love in French, and I did not even know HOW to speak French!

She was wearing a little polka dot biki... no, it was blue. No, a powder blue dress! She said it once belonged to her mom. Her mom wore it to her winter formal. She got it resized for her.

She asked me what I thought. I said... I am on my way. I will be there when you need me the most. I will be there for you... it is never easy to lose a loved one. I lost my mother a few years ago.

I wanted to tell her that everything was going to be fine, but... my jaw would not move.

I hear sirens getting closer. The rain still has not let up. Roads can get awfully slippery in this weather.

My mother’s song is still playing in my head, background music to scenes in my life. They go together well.

I see the first responder come up to me, give me a head-to-toe assessment and say: “Don’t worry, son, we got you. Don’t move.”

Yes, sir, I mentally answered him. I can definitely not move.

The EMT folks work fast and professionally. I have never seen such skills. The TV shows I watched have nothing on these people!

You guys deserve a medal. Several medals! But you all probably have more than a few already. I’ll just treat you all to burgers and fries. Even cheesy fries! Sky’s the limit!

Suddenly, the music in my head stopped. I could not hear the sirens or what the EMTs were saying. The rain got quiet. All sounds stopped.

I am standing. When did I...?

I turn around.

“Oh! Hi, Mom!”

Jonathan Diloy is a military veteran and full-time psychology student with a raging reading habit. He was a Navy Seabee and has worked for the US State Department, the White House Military Office, the National Institutes of Health, and Amazon. He has been to every continent except Australia and Antarcica. He attends Hagerstown Community College in Maryland. His experiences as a service member, global traveler, student, and husband to a wonderfully demanding woman have bestowed him with stories from the small moments of everyday life to the fantastical machinations of the imagination. 

Deleted by Ken Goldman

Widower, 29, seeks S/DF. I’m losing my hair, I smoke non-filtered Camels by the carton, I prefer to spend most Sundays trashing the NFL, and lately no one has mistaken me for Ryan Reynolds. That much said, I had been a loving husband, I like babies and animals, I can hook up a DVR, and I rank fairly high on the food chain.

Justin looked over the Internet message he had typed onto his IBM’s monitor, aware that self-deprecation tended to lose its charm once a woman sensed how well deserved it was. He really sucked at this, and one reading convinced him the ad reeked of defensiveness masked behind a strained attempt at cleverness. Worse, because of what it did not say the personal ad’s content was not entirely honest.

He hit ‘delete, ’and started over.

Widower, 29, physically challenged, seeks S/DF. You don’t have to be centerfold material or even attractive. You can be downright ugly. In fact, I prefer you to be ugly. I don’t de-serve anything better than a hag.

DAMN! DAMN!! DAMN!!!

White hot rage seemed the only emotion Justin felt capable of any more, and the moment got away from him again. He felt tempted to send the rewritten message as it stood but managed to pull himself back. Launched into cyberspace a personal ad this sick might attract the kind of woman who ate her young, but little else. Outbursts happened a lot with him lately, and the time had arrived for a reality check.

He hit ‘delete ’again, muttering while he ran his fingers through wispy strands of sandy hair. Pushing his wheelchair from the keyboard he reached for the photo album on the bookshelf. This daily ritual had become both self-defeating and painful, but he was a junkie addicted to memories of his past. Although his legs were as useless as pine logs, Justin’s hands had developed a will of their own.

He flipped through the photo album again and focused on one of the hundreds of snapshots he had taken with Sheila during the three years of their life together. The photo showed Justin and his young wife on a windy Long Island beach two summers ago. With arms entwined around one another like the newlyweds they were, they seemed the quintessential yin and yang in swimsuits. She was everything he was not, the beauty to his beast, the classic argument for the attraction of opposites. Justin could never fully understand just what Sheila had seen in him, but whatever it was he felt certain it had died the same day she had.

He studied the photo as if he held a Renoir in his hands. His young wife had been a knockout in that hot pink hint of a bikini she liked to wear. On that August afternoon he had been in such a feverish rush to make love to her that Sheila’s bikini bottom remained wrapped around her ankles the whole time.

Justin closed his eyes, and for a brief moment Sheila was there. He could even smell the wild honey scent of her hair. If he reached out she might stand before him, wanting him the way she had during the warm August afternoon captured in the photograph.

As always another memory forced its way into his head, the unwanted and uninvited remembering that chewed into his reflections like a voracious rat whenever his thoughts turned to Sheila. The memory remained inside Justin’s brain, a blood smeared freeze frame slowly churning itself into motion, exposing each torturous second of the last moments of Sheila’s life.

. . . The present collides with the past. Headlights of the oncoming eighteen wheeler come at him in an ambush of white light as the Toyota enters the rain swept Hartford ramp of Interstate 95. Sheila turns to look at him. She is like a confused child, unable to comprehend the enormity of the macabre moment they have entered into together. Ten tons of diesel truck bear down on them, and the small Toyota spins wildly, slamming the guard rail. The door on the passenger side shreds off in grotesque slow motion, and she is torn from her car seat. Thrown from the vehicle Sheila seems suspended in midair like a tossed rag doll. Her body skids upon the medial rail that promptly severs her upper torso from her lower, scattering the sections of her dissected flesh and gashed bone fifty feet apart.

Ten tons of metal effectively slammed what remained of Sheila into her grave and made match wood of the bones inside Justin’s legs.

Enter ‘delete ’and everything disappears. It was that simple.

Disabled Widower, 29, seeks anyone who can make the past disappear.

DamnDamnDamn…

He lit a cigarette, secretly hoping that his lungs might soon turn into ash and end the empty charade that had become his life. Of course, the punchline was that even the tiest life had to go on regardless of the uncertainty he felt about how that could happen.

The monitor of Justin’s computer remained empty. He returned to the keyboard willing himself to write something, anything.

Pitiful paraplegic, 29, more emotionally than physically challenged, desires any morsel of pity a woman might show toward a man who is incapable of getting over the death of the only woman who ever had the poor judgment to fall in love with him.

Succinct and to the point. More important, it was honest.

Who reads this sort of drivel anyway? he wondered.

Only the thousands of agoraphobes who had no lives of their own. Only those pathetic recluses who spent so much time at their computer terminals there seemed no world beyond their door that did not have the ‘cyber ’prefix attached to it. People who, if given the chance, might delete their entire lives.

Maybe he would deliver his personal ad unedited right now. Maybe he would send it out into the vast outreaches of cyberspace just to see what sort of excuse for a woman might respond, what sort of mirror image of himself was as desperate and alone.

The cigarette suddenly burned Justin’s lip, and pulling it from his mouth he realized he had smoked the Camel to a nub.

When he looked back at the computer’s monitor he discovered the screen read ‘message sent’. Some internal demon lurking within the darker chambers of his psyche had delivered the personal ad for him. Or, maybe his hands had operated independently of his brain again, just as they had done with Sheila’s photos in the album. In either case, the IBM’s monitor indicated the message had somehow irretrievably gone out courtesy of the Internet into the furthest regions of cyberland.

Gone. Departed like his legs and what used to be his life. Fading and disseminating out there somewhere in time or space along with Sheila and the scent of her hair during an afternoon on Long Island. All of it evaporating into mist except for the blinding lights of an eighteen wheeler tearing a crevice through the darkness of a rainy night.

It took a moment for the image to register, and at first it seemed his eyes had lost their focus along with his brain. He could see the blurred letters of the keyboard through his hands as if he were staring at them through smoked glass. He held his hand to the light. He might just as well have been staring through gauze.

For the first time in as long as he could remember, Justin almost smiled at the sinister absurdity of his circumstances. Everything was gone, yet at the same time nothing was. Try as he might he could not delete the ghosts. But the ghosts were not what he really wanted to make disappear. Some things were so ludicrous you almost had to laugh just to keep from screaming.

He knew he might remain right where he sat, there at the keyboard for the rest of the day waiting for a response that would never come. That was not the answer. But he knew what was. He typed a single sentence.

Not really seeking anyone, not any more.

Justin smiled again as he watched his hand continue to fade. Considering for a moment, he added another sentence.

Just want to erase it all.

He hit ‘delete ’and kept pressing down on the key, barely able to see the flesh of his own knuck-les.

His smile disappeared last.

Ken Goldman, former Philadelphia teacher of English and Film Studies, is an Active member of the Horror Writers Association. He has homes on the Main Line in Pennsylvania and at the Jersey shore. His stories have  appeared in over 970 independent press publications in the U.S., Canada,  the UK,  and Australia with over twenty due for publication in 2023-24. Ken’s tales have received seven honorable mentions in The Year’s Best Fantasy & Horror. He has written six books : three anthologies of short stories, YOU HAD ME AT ARRGH!! (Sam’s Dot Publishers), DONNY DOESN’T LIVE HERE ANYMORE (A/A Productions) and STAR-CROSSED (Vampires 2); and a novella, DESIREE,  (Damnation Books). His first novel OF A FEATHER (Horrific Tales Publishing) was released in January 2014. SINKHOLE, his second novel, was published by Bloodshot Books August 2017.

Orphaned Faerie Rings by Brynn Lietuvnikas

My dead mom’s house overflowed. Potted strawberry plants hung from the ceiling. The
walls curved strangely. Buckets of potatoes and dirt sat under every window. Mom had gotten weird in the end; we’d stopped connecting, so I’d stopped coming around. Last time I’d been here…it hadn’t been like this at all.

In our phone call from this past winter, I remembered her mentioning hiring someone to
help renovate her “hobbit hole,” but I’d been tuned out and had never asked what she’d meant.
This was what she’d meant.
I strolled over to the kitchen, where things only got worse. Mom had always loved to
make food for the two of us. She’d taught me from a young age how to bake bread and dice
various vegetables. She’d said she liked to have a “kitchen buddy.” That was before she’d gone
crazy.

Countless shelves lined the walls. More potted food plants hung and stacked everywhere.
A circular window like out of Pinterest centered the kitchen, showing off…the brick wall behind
it. Overgrown fresh thyme and basil trailed over the countertops and down the shelves. Every
plant’s container was adorned in…I guess you could call it art. Mom had never been good at
finger painting, but she’d finger painted. One of the pots boasted a blotty blue…flower? Another
had what I thought was a dog. Some of them I generously ascribed the category of abstract trees.
No pot lay empty, though. Give her that, she never was one for waste–

And a thought occurred to me.

I counted back the days that had passed, the time it’d taken to arrange her demanded
green burial and funeral “celebration,” and I realized. All of these plants should have been dead.
My gaze slowly spun around the crowded, small house. I eyed every odd vine and dwarf tree.
And I noticed. Everything was green. Not a shrivel or wilt in sight.

My skin broke into gooseflesh. I swallowed, my mouth suddenly dry.
“Psshh, they’re just resilient. Or she asked a neighbor to water them…”
Except she had no neighbors. She had insisted on living in the forest in the middle of
nowhere like a “goofy little woods witch.” And abruptly the thought of being utterly alone for
miles in this house scared the crap out of me. My heart began thumping despite my perfect
stillness.

What was I doing? Everything was fine. This was probably some complex grief thing, me
seeing nothing out of something because the person who’d raised me had died. Me searching for
answers, answers as to why a mentally ill but otherwise fairly healthy woman in her early fifties
would suddenly die in her sleep. Maybe even further back than that, perhaps searching for the
reason why my once light-hearted hippie mother had started growing erratic, refusing to leave
her house, singing to herself in gibberish words when she thought no one could hear her.

I started moving at a snail’s pace through the house, placing one foot in front of the other
again. The logical half of my brain told me I would search the house, find nothing, and it would
appease my terrified lizard brain. The other half…was looking for something, something I
instinctually knew had to be there.

I found myself in the basement. Tears pricked in my eyes, building with my anticipation.
Rounding the last dusty wooden step, I poked my head out into the damp darkness. I recalled
from when we’d gone house shopping for her post-retirement that the previous owner had used
the basement as a cellar for fancy wines, filled the place with dehumidifiers to keep up with the
moisture. Mom had never bothered, it seemed. The smell of old mold drifted up to meet my
nose.

And some primal intuition whispered in my ear something I’d never been told, “This is
where your Mamma keeps her mushrooms.”
A cold sweat broke out over my forehead. My breathing swiftly turned into panting. But
it was nothing. It had to be. My imagination was running wild, but my legs moved without my
control, and suddenly I was fully in the basement, eyes adjusted to the darkness, and I saw…the mushrooms.

Brynn Lietuvnikas is a graduating student of Hagerstown Community College under its Early College Degree Program, and she is a lifelong Creative Writer. Although she once thought she had retired her novelist cap, she is giving it another go with a personal romantasy project now reaching over one hundred and fifty pages. Brynn did not want to give up her short story practice either, however. She admits that she has written an unusually high number of short stories surrounding faerie circles, but she’s not about to stop now. 

Shitty Pontiac Grand Am by Naomi Sheely

I smile and nod for her to continue, while wishing she’d just shut up. Her hands flair in the air and I hate it. I hate how passionate she is, how much life she breathes into every word.

This is the same way she used to tell me bedtime stories. There were times that I was so scared to fall asleep that she’d be stuck there with me until the early hours of the morning. She never got frustrated or stern with me. No, my older sister, perfect person that she is, that she has always been, would only smile and start another one of her made up adventures. They usually featured two little girls surviving in a world where they could only trust each other.

They had always made me feel better. Somehow lessening the sting that no one else cared for us. She always knew the right things to say.

I try to hold onto those memories, to help ease the embarrassment that I feel when we’re in public together.

I struggle to keep the smile on my face as her hands land on the table a bit too loudly, before picking up the wrong fork.

I discreetly look around, already knowing what I’ll see: old money bitches having entire mocking conversations about us with nothing more than a few shared looks.

I hate them. I hate them more than I could ever hate my sister.

Years ago, I had been excited to marry into this life. It was a fairytale come to life. I had felt special when my husband would tell me that I was a breath of fresh air, someone more genuine than the people that ran in his usual circles, his family’s circle.

It had taken me months to figure out that the compliments my mother-in-law gave me were actually insults. Sharp, cunning, and cutting deeper than any other confrontation I’ve ever had.

Honestly, I hate my husband a little bit too. Him pulling me into this world, where I am surrounded by people who judge and judge until I hate myself more than I ever could them, it feels like a betrayal.

Finally, I can see our waitress making her way over. I have been ready for the check since she brought the food out. She smiles and goes to speak, but all that comes out is an obnoxious blaring sound.

Confused, she snaps her mouth shut, clears her throat, and tries again. The same thing happens, but this time I don’t feel as if I am sitting at the table. It feels like I am floating somewhere above it.

I try to hold onto the dream, to push the sounds of my alarm out of my mind.

As I open my eyes I push back the urge to cry.

I would give anything for just one more miserable minute at that table.

Instead, I sit up in my small twin bed, swinging my legs over the side, feet resting on the cold floor of my studio apartment.

I take a second to center myself before looking over to the only picture frame on my bedside table. It’s scratched, the stain is worn in places on each side, and one of the corners is glued together. It’s perfect.

I trace the face of the young woman centered in the photo. She’s laughing with her head thrown back. There is a kind of happiness in her that can’t be faked. This face was supposed to stand with me so that we could take on the world together. This is the face that I want to remember her by.

Not the thin, worn image from the newspaper article that I have hidden just behind it.

For me she had grown up fast, filling the shoes that our parents refused to. But no one had ever done the same for her. All the comfort and warmth that she provided me, she could only find from a guy named Ricky who sold 8-balls for eighty bucks out of his shitty Pontiac Grand Am.

For a second I let myself feel the embarrassment, the hatred that I have for her, for leaving me to face this life without her.

It takes me longer than normal to push the feelings back down, to stuff them in a box deep inside that I never consciously open. But I do it. I set her back down on the stand beside my bed and get ready for work.

It’s an hour later, after I have flipped off the lights and am halfway out the door that I pause, calling back to her, “I’ll see you tonight”.

It feels like I am trying to pressure her to be there again, and I guess I am. I will spend the rest of my life hoping to have shitty dreams of us together so I can escape the nightmare that is having to survive life alone.

Naomi Sheely thrives somewhere in chaos and caffeine. This has led her to the Dean’s list and literary publications at HCC, all while completing a double major and several all-night study sessions. It has, somehow, also given her a steady and calm husband and a well-behaved dog. Predictably, though, her three children are feral. There is no free time for hobbies, only the sweet escape of the written word.

Lovettsville by Hannah Gagnon

I sometimes eat lunch alone at a table on a busy sidewalk by a shopping center with brand new buildings. There’s a fancy new pizza place, a gym, and it looks like a new fast-food restaurant opening up across the street. There’s a new development of houses behind me that seem to have multiplied since I last came here.

I can remember a time when all of those buildings hadn’t yet been built, and in their place lay acres of empty fields. When the only road through town was a tiny little main street lined with old country homes that were more often than not a little run down, but held generations of character. When there were family-owned ma-and-pop shops, and when the sidewalks in the summer were filled with barefooted boys running about with wooden bats over their shoulders.

We used to all meet up at the pool in the morning. Seeing who could do the coolest dive, swim the fastest to the other side, or hold his or her breath the longest. The lifeguards used to blow their whistles and yell at us to stop running, but we did it anyway.

After swimming all day, we wandered around neighborhoods, feeling the dirt under our toes, and peeking out from behinds red maple trees to admire historic homes. We played games, and ran up and down the dirt path.

The sun would set over the mountains behind us, which meant it was time to grab dinner at the old-fashioned pizza place across the street. They had live music and the best fizzing, fruity soda I’ve ever tasted.

One by one, my friends traded their dirty white tank tops and jean shorts for trendy crop tops, Nikes, and the latest iPhone. And one by one, the fields where we used to play hours of endless baseball in our bare feet were replaced by stores and restaurants. And one by one, the ma and pop shops where I used to buy soda -- the kind that still came in glass bottles -- closed down.

Now, my shoes pinch my feet as I walk on the fresh asphalt in the crowded street. The homes I once admired must have shrunk, or perhaps I have grown. The people I used to swim with are now lifeguards that blow their whistle and yell at kids to stop running.

Hannah Gagnon is from Knoxville, MD. She has worked as a Digital Marketing Coordinator for a non-profit and is an emerging creative writer. She is currently a student at Hagerstown Community College. She enjoys writing poetry and short fiction about nature and the mountainous region where she grew up.

XTPE 413557 by Bill Suboski

Drone XTPE 413557 maintained a height of four hundred feet, with a standard deviation of altitude of fifteen feet as it flew along the southern shore of Lake Erie. XTPE 413557 was the newest generation of monitoring drones. A combination of light-weight battery packs, high efficiency solar cells and next generation electric engines meant that XTPE 413557 remained forever aloft, only landing when informed by weather servers of impending inclement weather, or for servicing as self-detected.

Three days ago hospitals worldwide had overflowed with patients. By the evening of that day, one in one hundred people worldwide had experienced symptoms: nausea, severe headache, diarrhea and / or dehydration. By evening of that day the early cases were bleeding from mucous membranes.

Drone XTPE 413557 overflew the Cleveland Lakefront Nature Preserve as it passed Bratenahl. Its onboard software kept it centered on the shoreline but the small size of the Preserve peninsula allowed it to overfly the half mile square area as it approached downtown Cleveland from the northwest. To the left of its direction of travel were the docks of the Intercity Yacht Club, and, across Interstate 90, the five baseball fields of Gordon Park arranged in a pentagonal pattern.

The traffic lights changed and cars were parked on the road sides. But no cars were moving. There were no pedestrians. Interstate 90 lay bare. Every hundred feet or so a car might be stopped on a shoulder. Birds flew and chirped but aside from that the hinterland of the city was silent.

The next morning, two days ago, one in ten people had had symptoms and two in a hundred from the previous day had died. There was no regular programming. Stations were either static or constant coverage; curfews were announced and by the afternoon military vehicles began to appear. Experts on television declared it to be a new type of hemorrhagic fever, fast-acting and lethally airborne. By evening, two days ago, two in five had symptoms and one in ten had died.

The social web collapsed. Workers from all sectors failed to appear at their jobs. Businesses closed. Scant army units tried and failed to enforce cordon zones. Those few people walking on the streets avoided each other. Violence flared in ten thousand thousand spots across the world where warnings to stay away were ignored.

Drone XTPE 413557 flew past the 55th Street East Marina. The drone flew almost directly above the stone breakwater. On previous passes children would wave, imagining that somewhere someone was looking through a camera on the drone, but such was not the case. There were no children today nor would there be again. Drone XTPE 413557 began a sweeping hyperbolic turn to the Northeast, anticipating the two overlaid rectangles that formed Burke Lakefront Airport.

One day ago nine in ten had symptoms and four in ten had died. None of the infected recovered, all died. The prognosis was evident: symptoms mean death. Human society no longer existed. No one walked the streets. There were no looters. There were no good Samaritans. Some had fled the cities, driving to remote areas, hometowns, backwoods cabins. This had the effect of infecting all the highways and turning all inhabited landmasses into isolated pockets of infection; free zones bordered on all sides by infectious areas.

XTPE 413557 passed the airport and flew across the small faux bay that held the USS Cod Submarine Memorial. The drone passed Voinovich Bicentennial Park and the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. It had just completed a data upload to a remote server in Buffalo, New York, and had in turn been handed off to a server in Toledo. Pointers were reset and onboard memory was logically if not electronically cleared to zero used. Ahead to the left was First Energy Stadium.

This morning six billion, eight hundred million humans had already died or were dying. The survivors were in outlying and rural areas although many of these had been infected by arrivals from cities. There were people in remote locations, the high arctic, McMurdo Station, and hermits and various other social isolates. Some of these regions had enough community and population to survive for several generations.

XTPE 413557 passed over Edgewater Park Beach. A young man wearing only shorts lay dead on the sand. The areas around his orifices were now a dark rust color. He lay expressionless in the morning sun. An orange rind and a half eaten sandwich lay beside him on the sand. XTPE 413557’s formerly southerly direction now became northerly again as it followed the curve of the coast back out into the lake on the journey west.

Everywhere an infected human breathed became a lethal zone. To exhale was to shed virus. Survivors had limited resources and as supplies became scarce they would fearfully forage into unknown territory. Often they would bring infection back to their band and the uninfected zones grew ever smaller. Those desperate few who had early fled the cities were almost always infected and their arrival meant death. Thirty days after it began there were only seven million survivors left, trapped in small areas.

Drone XTPE 413557 flew past the Lakewood high-rises and adjusted it’s heading again. It was now flying almost entirely west and only slightly north. It overflew the small peninsula of Lakewood Park. Somewhere in among the trees a hungry dog barked and snarled at the movement.

There were small breeding populations, but there was nowhere to expand into that could be considered safe. In 2132, one hundred and fourteen years after the first case, the last human being would die. Twelve years later from now drone XTPE 413557 would develop a critical fault in a motor. This would cause it to drift out over Lake Erie, and a day later, it would be torn apart by a thunderstorm.

Bill is an aspiring fiction writer with a background in computer programming. He is still trying to decide what he wants to be when he grows up. Born in Indiana, Bill is a transplanted Hoosier living as a Buckeye by way of Canada and the Netherlands. Contact Bill at [email protected].

Eggs by Jennifer Maloney

At night I curl beneath the quilt, made of silence, darkness,
cotton, embroidery,
I coil against myself under its weight and feel the night upwell
with whatever dreams
I may wade through or sink into like a mound of flowers.
I bend and press my face to them, the scent of Mother’s Day and
funeral homes,
the purple fragrance of Easter, and colors start to spiral like a
spinning egg,
bedecked with bright lacquer and ribbons.
When the eggs start dancing like girls in wooden shoes, tuck
their fists against their hips, tip their heads from side to side and
whistle, kick their carved clogs, kerchiefs bobbing in time, red-
cheeked as Hummel figurines—when the eggs start to dance,
you know they’ve probably gone bad.
Which is too bad because they’re absolutely darling: perfectly fit
to the palm of one’s hand when they aren’t dressed like Hansel
and Gretel.
A dozen elliptical children, white, brown, speckled, smooth,
they’ve been waiting, patient as stones, for weeks in the refrigerator,
waiting to be fried or boiled, scrambled, mixed into cake batter or
fried rice.
Waiting with still solemnity, uniformity, in prayerful rows, bowed
heads, eyes closed, ommmm...until, one day, one of them squints.
Casts a jaundiced eye around the place, mutters what’s it all for,
anyway?
and sighs in existential ennui, understanding that life, after all, is
not about fulfilling a purpose, but is in fact utterly absurd, devoid
of reason, and so decides why not,
why not and begins to spin in place like a dervish,
scrambling its own brains but at least going out with some sense
of autonomy instead of this endless waiting, for what?
To be used? No—to be of service, murmur its brothers and sisters,
who then return, once again, to their mindful breathing.

A writer of fiction and poetry, Jennifer Maloney is a disabled woman living with chronic illness. Find her work in Litro Magazine, Literally Stories, The Magazine of Fantasy & Science Fiction, Neologism Poetry Journal and many other places. Jennifer is the co-editor of the poetry anthology Moving Images: Poetry Inspired by Film (Before Your Quiet Eyes Publishing, 2021) and the author of Evidence of Fire, Poems & Stories (Clare Songbirds Publishing, 2023) and Don’t Let God Know You are Singings (Before Your Quiet Eyes Publishing, 2024). Jennifer is also a parent, a partner, and a very lucky friend, and she is grateful, every day, for all of it.