I find you in fleeting moments
mostly
when I lose myself and
then you are gone behind your mask.
I find you when I go to pieces sobbing and broken on my
cold bathroom floor.
I find you all those long ago nights
when I danced in warehouses with euphoric abandon
in ecstasy’s warm embrace.
You were the faces in the crowd
and me
when I was far past gone
and standing beside myself…
I find you in when I’m vanished in a song
front row
facemelting icecreamed
or in my bedroom silence
glimpsing eternity in the now.
I find you when I have no words
as the light bends
and wraps itself
around the Shaman’s song.
You trample me savage one
tear me open
tenderfrenzy
slay me laughing thrice born one
crush me like grapes underfoot
bleeding vine
mirrormask
You whisper in my ear
that the sun is nothing more than a star
in a sky full of them
and I am born again.